December of 2016, and meditative on where I've come to, who I've helped and hurt and broken and created along the way. I've stalled on my bachelor's degree. I lost a job I had for years and years back in the summer and I'm back to the bottom rung with a new temp gig at a call center. I haven't had motivation or time for art in months, but I'd started selling designs over at http://scumhaus.threadless.com
so there's that. This year has been so painful, so many great stories ended, so many disappointments, and challenges. My oldest son is autistic, beautiful and perpetually inspiring, and I try and sometimes succeed at the advice given by a distant and now gone friend to not take things for granted...
I struggle and I disappoint myself, and I keep going. The world around me changes and stays the same and I hope for clarity and grace and humor. I shout into the void sometimes, but internalize more than not. Thirty- five years in and I still feel stuck in adolescence, with enough guilt and bruises to regret but not enough brains to let go. Maybe it'll be different in a good way in another half decade when I check back in again.
So it goes.